#handsometaipeiguy

Oh hey, long time no see. There's nothing new with me, I'm just having an existential crisis revolving around one central question--

Exactly how many chances can we get until we're done for good?

BACKSTORY. I attended the 2016 ACOMS here in Manila (because, well.. Surgery is life). I'm still in undergrad, but I got to ride the waves because I have two Clinical Instructors who are PCOMS Fellows. I could go on and on about all the things I've learned and all the insights I've gained, but there are just abstract things that could not be given justice by words alone. 

So, for now, please just let me be a girl, and allow me to tell you about my ACOMS crush. 

So there was this guy. I never learned his name, but I've referred to him as #handsometaipeiguy since last Thursday evening during the Fellowship Night. I remember wanting to talk to him multiple times, but I didn't know how to attack. I felt that I had the chance when I was at the cocktail table next to where he was. Apparently, a beer bottle fell, and I remember seeing him trying to clear away the glass shards. I really wanted to pull him away and tell him to let the maintenance staff take care of it because he might get wounded or something-- but I didn't. I was too shy. Heehee..

At one point, we were standing around three feet away from each other. I really wanted to get closer to him and introduce myself, as he had a student ID, and we both had our student statuses in common (but at that point, I was carrying a local delegate ID [which is the same ID as the one real dentists had]-- I later had this changed to a student ID, thinking that students wouldn't approach me because they'd think that I was a legit surgeon already). In my head, I had the perfect dialogue flow mapped out, I felt that all I had to do was wait. Minutes later, everybody between us started disappearing, I was in constant movement (dancing in place, haha), and all of a sudden, he was right there beside me. We very slightly bumped into each other, and as soon as it had sunken in, he started moving away.:( 

On the car ride home from the Fellowship Night, I told myself that when I'd see him the next day at the lecture halls, I'd take the seat behind him no matter what. Unfortunately, my no matter what didn't really push through. Hmm.. Come to think of it, I always did plan to sit beside him "no matter what", but obviously, it never happened, hahaha.

Yesterday was the last day of the congress, I remember being beside him again while exiting one of the halls to transfer to the next hall. I was just really stunned that I was beside my crush again! I would have faced him and smiled, but I was too busy planning our life together and naming our future children. Hahahahahahaha. 

I really wanted to see him after the Closing Ceremonies, so while the Taiwan delegation was taking photos, I was outside the hall with my very supportive future OMS Residency siblings, we were waiting for him to come out so that they could take pictures of me and him together-- and by together, I don't mean pictures like those "selfies" I took that "accidentally" had him in the background. I have such great love for my OMS ates, I had just met them two days prior, and they were already very supportive towards the advancement of my love life.. and that's exactly why I'm eyeing a one-way ticket to the 5th Floor at St. Jude. :) 

..and then I met Monica. I was with Dr. Diandra (OMS Ate!), and the very beautiful Monica came up to her, and then they started talking about beaches. At the shortest pause, I told her, "Your friend is very cute", and the rest was history.<3 During Taiwan Night, Monica wanted to introduce me to #handsometaipeiguy, but I was so shy, so I went to the bathroom first, to beautify. I didn't know what to do, so I whipped out my phone, and called the first sensible male I could find to give me advice-- it was my IDEM bro from Malaysia, Su Jiun. With the toilets as my witnesses I was like, "What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?" the whole time. REALLY. It took me a loooong time to get my brain working, that by the time I was ready to face #handsometaipeiguy and introduce myself, the party was over, and everyone was gone.

..and just like that, I realized that I blew my last chance, and that I may never see #handsometaipeiguy ever again. :(

Okay, so now, I'm always gonna be wondering.. What if I had spoken to him? What if I had said hello? What if I had introduced myself? --all that, because I was too shy. People, learn from my mistake. It's not every day that you encounter a #handsometaipeiguy ..Unless you're in Taipei (?).